When we’re outside your home and with other people, it seems typical for everyone to try to show common courtesy. You do not decide on a restaurant or movie to watch on your own because the rest of the group may not like it. If the majority picks a different option, you may go with the flow and not worry much about it. You are with good folks you love; that’s why nothing can go wrong, correct?
“Hostility or aggression is a behavior, often the direct result of anger that goes unchecked. Most people believe that they have little to no control over their hostility or aggression, and even less control over anger.” That is according to Ben Martin, Psy.D. In dire occasions, e.g., you feel mistreated or angry, the last thing you should think of is common courtesy. Being polite and not wearing emotions on your sleeve may seem like the proper choice at that point, yes. However, remember too that repressing rage merely allows negative feelings to pile on top of each other. It won’t ever give them a chance to dissipate; thus, you may even need to get anger management counseling to live normally later.
Considering you have no idea of what suppressed fury looks like, below are the signs that you might have it.
- Your Time Gets Wasted While Thinking About Things You Should’ve Said
The first pointer that you’re repressing your emotions too much is that your day won’t pass without your head in the clouds for hours. “The challenge with anger is finding a way to express it in a way that doesn’t make others want to shut down or become defensive or scared.” John M. Grohol, Psy.D. said. You are not pondering about your next business venture or a new invention that can save lives in the future in particular. You may just be replaying the incident that made you mad recently and thinking of how your conversation should have gone if you spoke up.
Reflecting on irreversible matters over and over is not the work of a genuinely Zen person, to be honest. Not only are you wasting your time, but you surely are using much energy on something that’s already occurred. Thus, it may be essential for you to talk to a therapist who can help in readdressing your path.
- You Are Too Passive
Being overly receptive to the events going on around you is slightly suspicious as well.
The thing is, it is impossible for anyone to be okay with everything that others say or want. We all have diverse opinions about specific topics, and there may be instances wherein your point of view is different from the rest. In case you hate arguments and confrontations, though, you might decide to keep quiet and act like a blind follower.
The reason why a passive individual needs anger management counseling is that the characteristic may flip all of a sudden and turn you into an aggressive person once provoked. Your sense of logic may disappear then, and you’ll pose as a danger to many people. Luckily, you can prevent that by gaining assistance from a counselor.
- Your Depression Becomes Worse By The Minute
Experts also tend to link suppressed rage to this mental disorder, are you aware of that? It is because some patients come to counseling professionals on occasion, complaining about an unexplained depression. Honestly, “Depression is more than an emotion or a state of mind, it is really a process. It is a combination of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.” Robert Allison, MA, LPC said. In other words, they feel low and hopeless, but they don’t have the usual triggers, such as work-related stress, toxic relationship, loss of a loved one, et cetera.
Once the therapist confirms that none of those causative agents is the culprit, he or she may eventually look into the possibility that the client harbors deep-rooted anger and resentment. If proven, the necessary therapy, of course, has a relation to controlling rage.
See an anger management counseling expert if you notice yourself carrying any of the indications above.