Frequently Asked Questions About How To Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself

The COVID-19 pandemic was all kinds of awful – there’s no doubt about that – but it also made a lot of people realize new things about themselves.

In my case, for instance, I realized that I had many unexplored talents that I would not have found out if I was out of the house all the time. I learned how to bake, cook, and even knit sweaters during the pandemic. I also became closer than ever to my parents, which I thought was impossible because we rarely saw eye to eye in the past.

In my boss’s case, we heard that he realized that all he needed to feel complete was his wife and new baby. Don’t get me wrong – he’s known to be a great husband and father, but he was also a workaholic. Although he was entitled to a paternity leave after his son’s birth, he still went to work every day. But due to the pandemic, he did not have much work to do, and he finally got to spend time with his family.

Unfortunately, not everyone had at least one positive experience during this pandemic. One of my long-time friends, Julia, lost her job at a local broadcasting network because they could no longer pay for new reporters. She eventually found another one as an online writer, but the pay was only a third of her previous salary. It was not enough for her rent, so she had to move back to her parents’ house.  

Before the move, Julia told me how relieved she left to live with her parents again. She had not been there longer than a week since college, and it would be nice to catch up with her other relatives in the neighborhood. However, when I called Julia to ask how she’s settling in after 30 days, she sounded despondent.

“It has been a crappy stay so far. My parents were great; I have nothing bad to say to them. But as for my aunts and grandma, I can think of many,” Julia said.

Curious, I asked, “How come? I thought you are everyone’s favorite.”

She sighed. “Yes. That was when I was still a reporter. Now, they keep comparing me to my other cousins, who did not lose their jobs during the pandemic. They would say, “Oh, look at Mari; she’s earning well since she’s a doctor. You should have studied to become one, too.” I mean, can’t I get a break? I am a failure – I get it.” 

“Hey, you should not say that. You are not a failure.” I tried to appease Julia.

“Come on; admit it. If I’m not, I should have a stable job even now. The broadcasting station let me go because I was expendable.”

Our conversation ended with me unable to stop my friend from being angry and feeling sorry for herself. In truth, I did not know how to do that or what to say that would not upset Julia further. I initially thought of inviting her to stay in my house, but it would only be a quick fix, not a long-term solution. Thus, I quizzed my husband – who is also a psychologist – about the following things:

What does it mean to feel sorry for yourself? 

Feeling sorry for yourself entails that you find yourself pitiful in a specific situation.

Is it wrong to feel sorry about yourself? 

No, it is not wrong to feel sorry for yourself. Sometimes, this feeling pushes you to make a much-needed change in your life.

What’s another word for self-pity? 

Victim-playing is another word for self-pity.

How do you deal with self-pity? 

  • Practice self-compassion and go through the emotions that accompany self-pity. That is more ideal than forcing yourself to act happy.
  • Recognize it when you are self-pitying. Doing so allows you to realize how it affects the people around you.
  • Avoid welcoming the victim mentality. Considering you have not been abused or violated somehow, blaming others for how you feel will not make the problems go away.
  • Rephrase the questions in your head. Practically speaking, instead of asking why, change it into what, where, when, and how.
  • Accept that your perception is your own and that it may not always be correct. This way, you can push yourself to see the situation in another light.
  • Be brave enough to admit that you are self-pitying and that it is not always good. 
  • Instead of focusing on your negative thoughts, try to look at all the blessings you have experienced.
  • Contribute to society to avoid thinking sad thoughts about yourself.

Why do I have so much self-pity? 

You tend to experience so much self-pity because you are not making progress in life, which fuels negative thinking.

What does it mean to wallow in self-pity? 

Wallowing in self-pity entails that you bask in your sadness.

What is the opposite of self-pity? 

Self-esteem is the opposite of self-pity.

What does to wallow mean? 

The term “to wallow” is an intransitive verb that means finding delight in something.

What does it mean to wallow in sorrow? 

“To wallow in sorrow” means that you enjoy feeling sorrowful.

How do I stop wallowing? 

  • Face your problems at once.
  • Try to catch yourself wallowing.
  • Challenge your thoughts.
  • Prove your negative thoughts wrong.
  • Focus on brain-stimulating or positive activities.
  • Be more grateful for your blessings.
  • Give back to others.
  • Stop complaining about what you do not or cannot have.
  • Stay optimistic about life, no matter how challenging it may seem.

Final Thoughts

The best thing I could think of to help my friend was to drag her to my charitable activities. For instance, I would call and ask her to come over and pack the lunches I prepared for the local hospital’s healthcare workers. Sometimes, we would drop by an orphanage to bring new clothes or toys for the kids. Those were little activities that took no more than eight hours, but after the fifth charitable act, Julia told me how guilty she felt for wallowing for being compared to others. 

“These people are genuinely happy about simple things. I need to be more like them. Perhaps that would change my life for the better.”

Frequently Asked Questions in Psychotherapy in PTSD

It is not fully clear how humans developed emotions, but we already understand its significance for forging connections and communicating with others. Fear, in particular, has been keeping us safe from harm. It is also a normal feeling after encountering a traumatic event or loss. However, some may find it difficult to move on from the trauma even after some time, which is a symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD.


Post-traumatic stress disorder is mental health disorder affecting people who had experienced or witness terrifying events like death, accidents, and violence. Some people may start showing symptoms a month after the trigger; others may not display any signs until years after the trauma. These may come and go and vary in intensity, depending on what triggered the memories or fear.

The common symptoms of PTSD are intrusive memories, isolation, emotional numbness, and anxiety. This condition also affects concentration and sleeping, which significantly impacts people’s quality of life. It also has effects on relationships and work and thus needs proper care and treatment.

Fortunately, several methods can help individuals deal with symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. Medications can help improve its symptoms. Some drugs for PTSD are antidepressants, anti-anxiety medicines, and prazosin.


Sometimes, medication alone is not enough, and you may need to undergo therapy. Psychotherapy or talk therapy is constructive for people with PTSD. It can help them understand their condition and what they can do to control its symptoms and deal with its triggers.

There are several types of talk therapy, and your doctor will help determine what type will work best for you. Cognitive processing therapy, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and exposure therapy are the most common methods used for people with PTSD.

Here are some frequently asked questions about different talk therapy methods for people with post-traumatic stress disorder.

How effective is cognitive processing therapy?

Cognitive processing therapy effectively reduces total post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) checklist scores. CPT is useful in treating the trauma by challenging negative thoughts. This type of treatment allows for a better perspective on things that the trauma tends to cloud.

Is cognitive processing therapy evidence-based?

Yes, CPT is an evidence-based therapy. Rigorous scientific studies conducted by professionals and experts in the field have proven CPT to be effective.

Who developed cognitive processing therapy?
Dr. Patricia Resick developed cognitive processing therapy with the help of other psychologists and experts. The treatment goal is to manage PTSD for those who experienced sexual assault.

What is the best medication for PTSD?

Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) are the recommended medications for those who have PTSD. The most effective SSRI/SNRI medications for those who have PTSD are

  • sertraline (Zoloft),
  • venlafaxine (Effexor),
  • fluoxetine (Prozac), and
  • paroxetine (Paxil).

How long is cognitive processing therapy?

Generally, CPT is done in 12 sessions, ideally in three months. This duration aims to help patients understand how to challenge and reform the unhelpful beliefs related to their trauma. The goal is for the patient to understand and have a new perspective of the traumatic event to reduce its adverse effects on the patient’s day-to-day life.

What therapy is best for trauma?

There are a lot of therapies available to overcome trauma, but the standard treatments are:

  • Pharmacotherapy: use of medications to manage the disruptive reactions caused by the trauma
  • Behavior Therapy: also known as exposure therapy, wherein you will face the same situation that caused the trauma, minus the feared consequences that arose from it.
  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: it is a type of therapy wherein the patient is taught to correct and change their thoughts and increase their knowledge and skills. An example of this is breathing exercises.
  • Group Therapy: therapy wherein there is a specific support group for the type of trauma encountered. It can be a peer group or a group that has a therapist leading the group.

What are stuck points?

Some thoughts obstruct us from recovering, and they are called stuck points. They are negative thoughts composed of blaming oneself for the trauma encountered, and these points are usually concise and direct.

Who needs cognitive behavioral therapy?

CBT is a beneficial therapy that treats mental health disorders, like depression, eating disorders, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). CBT isn’t only confined to those who suffer from mental health problems. It can also be a useful tool to help those who want to learn how to manage stressful life situations in a much better way.

How do I get certified in cognitive processing therapy?

To be a certified provider in cognitive processing therapy, you must meet the following requirements:

  1. Must have a professional licensure/registration as a mental health professional, with psychotherapy in the scope of practice
  2. Must have completed the CPT web, with an attached certificate of completion
  3. Must participate in a live CPT training that was held by either a treatment developer or a registered CPT Trainer
  4. Must have total participation of 20 hours in an authorized group Cognitive Processing Therapy consultation, including a discussion of own clients on the call. Or a minimum of 12 hours of supervision in an individual Cognitive Processing Therapy.
  5. Must complete preliminaries of at least four individual CPT cases or two group CPT or a combination. Must also complete (including early client success outcomes) two individual CPT treatment cases, two group CPT, or one CPT group, and one individual case.
  6. Must use at least one regulated means to evaluate the weekly progress of the PTSD symptoms with each of the above cases.
  7. Submission of case notes, PCL scores, and worksheet samples or stuck point logs are requested for evaluation.

How effective are PTSD treatments?

PTSD treatments, like CBT, are found to be highly effective, especially for patients who suffered from traumatic events. While it does not permanently cure the symptoms of PTSD, it dramatically helps with their day-to-day life. Studies show that people who go through treatment improve the skills to help individuals deal with the said condition.

Is Prolonged exposure therapy evidence-based?

Prolonged exposure is beneficial for people living with PTSD. It is the first-line treatment for those who have PTSD. It helps the person efficiently deal with memories, situations, and feelings related to trauma.

What is an impact statement in cognitive processing therapy?

Impact statements are essays written by CPT clients at the onset of treatment and are written again before the last therapy session. The clients describe how the traumatic event happened, what it meant to them, and how it affected how they viewed themselves, the people around them, and the world.

What are stuck points in cognitive processing therapy?

Sometimes, we have statements about ourselves, others, or the world that are extreme, exaggerated, and often harmful. These thoughts and ideas focus on the five themes covered in Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) treatment: trust, safety, esteem, control, and intimacy. These statements or …

Top Ways To Take Care Of Your Child’s Mental Health

As a parent, you should always keep in mind that a child’s mental health is also as vital as their emotional and physical health. Believe it or not, the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) revealed that one out of five children undergoes mental health issues per year. Therefore, it is your role as a parent to keep your kid mentally healthy all the time. Here are some ways to do so. 

Practice Self-Care

The first step into taking care of your child’s mental health is to keep yours healthy as well. If you don’t, it would be difficult for you to assist your child with this process. Not only will they copy your bad habits, but it will also establish an environment that is not safe for your kid.

The best way to go about this is to set a positive habit every day. Keep in mind that your kid is always watching you. They copy whatever you do. Therefore, make sure that you show them the right attitude when dealing with stressful situations. 

Studies also show that if parents have mental health issues themselves, this will also trickle down to their kids. They’ll probably feel the negative energy from your problems. Therefore, make sure to seek assistance from healthcare professionals once you experience such issues. 

Encourage Playing

For children, playing is just playing, and playing is for fun. However, are you aware that their playtime also weighs the same with food and physical care? These activities are opportunities for your child to learn self-control, creativity, and problem-solving skills. It boosts how their minds work, which is an excellent strategy to keep both their physical and mental health as healthy as possible.

Introduce The Language Of Feelings

One of the reasons why children spiral down is that they don’t know how emotions work. As a parent, it is your responsibility to introduce the concept of feelings. You should teach them how to recognize their feelings and translate these by expressing them in words. Assist them with the perfect terms to use to mirror what they’re feeling.

At the same time, make sure that they do not keep their real emotions hidden. It happens most of the time because they see unhappy feelings as something shameful and damaging. However, it is also healthy to explore these emotions, given that it is normal to experience this. Knowing these negative emotions will help them deal with it in the long run. It is also your duty as a parent to advise on how they can cope with these. 

Establish Trust

Your relationship with your child will be the foundation of everything. You won’t be able to guide them without building trust. You can do this by creating an environment full of security and safety. So, where do you start?

You can do this by trying your best to meet your child’s needs. Make sure to take care of them when they’re thirsty, hungry, not feeling well, anxious, scared, etc. With this, your child will get the message that he or she can trust you fully. 

Avoid Negative Reinforcement

Keep in mind that negative reinforcement will never be the answer. If your child does something terrible, do not result in nagging, bribes, and threats, for these are seldom effective. The best strategy for this is to explain calmly and provide the reason why you are disciplining them. Discuss with them the possible consequences should they continue with these actions.

Keep in mind that negative reinforcements only affect their mental health. There is a large possibility that this will only hinder them from opening up to you. As mentioned, it is essential to understand their emotions and allow them to show this. However, if you push for negative reinforcement, they’ll most likely be afraid to consult with you since they’re scared to be “punished.”

Teach Stress Management

Stress will always be present, no matter whether you’re an adult or a child. It’s a part of life; therefore, your child must deal with it naturally and healthily. It will help him take control of his life in the future.

Always keep in mind that there is no single stress management strategy to address this. There are various ways to combat its adverse effects on your body, but it has to be personal. What takes away the stress of one child might not be as successful with another one. 

For instance, your child may opt to call a friend whenever they’re feeling down. However, talking to a friend might only bring additional anxiousness to another person when having problems. Writing in a journal may be more effective with him or her. 

Taking care of your child’s mental health is not an easy task. If you feel that your child’s mental health is spiraling out of control, then maybe it is time for you to look for professional advice. Remember that there is no such thing as too early to get the assistance of a mental health provider. It will certainly help both you and your child. 

Leaving Stress Untreated Is Dangerous


Screaming kids, stupid bosses, insane in-laws, frozen traffic, dying laptop batteries: everybody has a few sources of stress in their life. The problem is that our brains and minds are just not very good at distinguishing, emotionally, between seeing a sabre-toothed tiger on the horizon and receiving a high phone bill. One is a threat to our family’s safety, the other is really just an unpleasant surprise, but they can both produce the same kinds of physical, fight or flight responses in our bodies – hormones are released, breathing becomes shallower, muscles tense up, heart rate and blood pressure rise.

A single experience of this type is not the end of the world – it is nearly impossible to die from fright. Some people even enjoy the sensation and go skydiving or see horror movies just for the thrill. When simple fear becomes chronic stress, though – when these experiences occur on a daily basis for an extended period of time – the mental and physical consequences can become severe. Everybody should know what the symptoms of unhealthy stress levels are, and recognize them early enough to pursue treatment in the form of medication, talk therapy or other options. Such therapy is becoming a popular option.


Stress and the Individual

It is obvious enough not to need mentioning that not everyone experiences stress and stressful situations in the same way. Someone who will cheerfully step into a boxing ring might be terrified of public speaking. Personalities also differ in how well they cope with stress. Some individuals seem capable of compartmentalizing the different parts of their life so that they can be highly stressed at one moment but totally relaxed the next. Others are able to breeze through life’s rough patches without missing a beat when most of us will want to give up or at least take a step back.

In fact, stress isn’t always bad. In small enough doses, it can heighten a person’s powers of concentration, boost creativity and provide motivation. It only becomes a problem when it produces anxiety or interferes with a person’s daily tasks, which usually happens when it persists over the long term.


Managing the Sources of Stress

The first step to managing the sources of a person’s stress is to identify which “triggers” affect them most, a task which requires a little introspection and self-honesty. Where these stressors can’t be entirely avoided, it is usually at least possible to control their frequency or intensity, or schedule them at times when they are easier to face.

If trying to bulldoze through rush hour is frequently leaving you out of breath by the time you arrive at work, it might be possible to change your schedule. If a family member is constantly laying their burdens on you, it might be time to discuss some boundaries with them. Of course, making such changes will usually require some effort or sacrifice, and you will occasionally have to say “no” for the sake of your own health.

In many cases, a person’s stress triggers will be internal, either in the form of a mental habit that leads to a state of anxiety, or an association with some traumatic event belonging to the past. In this case, managing stress might best be done by consulting a therapist in order to address these root causes.

What Chronic Stress May Bring with It

Long-term stress, such as that caused by conflicts in the family or a persistently unpleasant work situation, is unpleasant enough in and of itself. It can lead to feelings of anxiety, loss of focus and concentration, and insomnia.

Stress is not just a mental phenomenon but places a strain on the whole body, which means that a person’s immune system will become compromised. At work, the first sign that someone is suffering from excessive stress is often them taking an abnormal number of sick days for seemingly unrelated conditions, such as the flu and stomach upsets. If the problem is not addressed, a loss of judgment, avoidance of responsibility and eventual burnout are likely results.

At home, chronic stress may manifest as increased irritability, drawing away from family members and little to no sex drive. Such a person may have little energy and yet have difficulty sleeping or relaxing. It may also be very difficult for them to explain why they are acting the way they do.

If chronic stress is not managed or treated even after the above symptoms have become apparent, things become truly scary. Further mental health issues such as depression and anxiety disorders may develop, as well as any of a large variety of cardiovascular problems. Skin problems such as eczema may appear in persons who have never suffered from them before, and the digestive system also starts to break down.

Chronic stress can literally kill. If it is not recognized in its early stages, it becomes progressively more difficult to address as time goes on. When a person is beginning to feel overwhelmed, whether at work, at home or in any other context, something as simple as going for a quick run can work miracles.…

Psychology For Managers How To Prevent Valuable Employees From Leaving

After profitability and debt to equity ratios, employee churn is probably the best indication of any company’s fundamental health. Every time someone hits the road, all their training, experience and knowledge leave with them. If that person was in a key position, it can take months to rebuild their internal and external relationships, familiarity with the industry and basic competence in that role.


Reducing staff turnover by offering higher salaries is a very poor solution. In the first place, this obviously costs the company money. Secondly, there are certain things people simply won’t do for a wage, with the possible exception of lawyers. Instead, organizing work so that employees don’t end up feeling unappreciated, overburdened or unnecessarily stressed can increase their job satisfaction, company loyalty, and productivity without having to spend a cent.  A pat on the back or words of appreciation or acknowledgment can do wonders, and conversely, can seriously affect employee motivation if otherwise.


Provide Clear Direction

Why do employees at start-up firms cheerfully work insanely long hours for a paltry salary and little job security? Aside from things like stock options, part of what motivates them is the feeling that they are contributing to building something worthwhile; that they are somehow making the world a better place.


Certain leaders are reverently called “visionary”, but merely having a vision is not sufficient by itself. Visionary leaders are those who manage to clearly communicate their objectives and have the ability to do them and teach them to their subordinates. If this is not done, each worker will feel like they are just another cog in the machine instead of a member of a team, unappreciated and easily replaceable.


On a day to day level, it is extremely important that each individual understands what his tasks are, what resources are available to him and what result is expected. This principle is simple to state but is often neglected in practice. It is very dangerous to assume that everyone is always on the same page as far as operational issues are concerned.


Don’t Play Favorites

Every company has more or less valuable employees, but how easy is it to tell the difference? Some people have a talent for putting themselves forward and highlighting their achievements, but the impression this creates is not always directly related to their real productivity.


This issue is magnified in a context where it is difficult to measure performance accurately. Where this is the case, however, a situation often arises where the only reward an employee can expect for good work is more demanding tasks. If a stellar performer realizes that he is doing far more than his colleagues, but receives the same compensation, he will most likely start looking for greener pastures where his contribution will be appreciated.


To avoid the appearance of favoritism, rewards such as promotions and bonuses have to be issued based on a transparent framework. A manager should aim to spend a roughly equal amount of time with each of their subordinates in order to avoid creating a yes-men culture. Where rules regarding dress, timeliness and administrative procedures exist, they should apply equally to every employee with no exceptions.


Pay Attention to the Little Things

An off-hand comment such as “we pay you too much for this” will often cause a highly skilled specialist to walk out, with no notice given and no intention of returning. However many dollars and plastic trophies a person receives, if they feel like they and their work are not appreciated, their dedication will be lost even if they choose to stay a little longer.


Although it’s not required to socialize outside of work or become friends, a good manager will get to know their subordinates as individuals. Building a basic level of rapport and beginning to understand a person’s values and way of thinking is crucial to efficient two-way communication.


Simply knowing how to talk to people is a management skill that’s more valuable than is commonly realized. Asking people for their input on a decision that’s already been taken, failing to practice active listening, and waiting for a formal review before providing feedback on workers’ performances are all frequent yet avoidable mistakes.


Trust Your Employees

When someone is hired, it is implicitly assumed that they will be able to perform the tasks set out in their job description. Constantly looking over their shoulders, asking for updates at every single step and reprimanding them for trivial mistakes are all indications that the employee is not trusted, which will quickly leave them feeling demotivated.


An employee who does feel like he’s being depended on, by contrast, will be that much more likely to seek help or guidance when needed and be more willing to share suggestions and opinions. Occasional mistakes are a part of innovation and improvement, and if workers are afraid to fail, they will be too afraid to work towards progress and efficiency.


Respect the Work/Life Balance

Naturally, at times work will be urgent and overtime required. If this happens occasionally, it is not a problem. If it is a constant occurrence, chances are that a team is understaffed or workflow not being properly managed. Should an employee be forced to choose between his job and his relationship with his family, the family is likely to win out.


In a different world, management might be about maximizing some attributes or metrics. In the one we live in, though, the correct word is optimized. A manager needs to be assertive but not over-controlling, approachable while still maintaining some distance from subordinates, and make employees feel empowered but not rudderless.


This constant balancing act is not easy to accomplish, but the clearest indication that something is not being done right is frequent resignations. Remember: people rarely leave jobs or companies, they leave managers.


Digital Therapy: Improving Medical And Mental Health Solutions

Understanding Digital Therapy

 Technically, digital therapy is a virtual method of treating medical and mental health issues of individuals with varying problems. Some of these people turn to digital therapy because they are hesitant to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist face to face. Ironically, some people have been going to traditional therapy but decided to switch to digital therapy because they found it to be equally therapeutic and effective than going to their usual therapist.

What does digital therapy really encompass and how does it work for our best? Let us learn about it through some stories about people (whom we will name differently) who have experienced and have been successfully treated through digital therapy.


Nicole the Actress

 Having bounced from one traditional therapist to another, Nicole just switched to digital counseling a few weeks ago. She had been used to visiting her shrinks as much as she could, which was once a month – or once in two months – because as an actress she has a hectic schedule and she also travels. According to clinical psychologist Nina Barlevy, PsyD, “online care is not for every patient or practitioner. Clients with more serious mental illnesses or addictions likely need more treatment than digital therapy can provide. And some clinicians may find certain telehealth modalities difficult.”

When asked about the efficacy of traditional therapy for her, she said, “I loved my therapists. They knew when to let me talk it out, and they knew when to let me cry it out. They actually helped me make sense of my insomnia, depression, and anger issues. But Denise and I had to part because I often flew to London for a few months. Rose was next but that time I had two projects which were overlapping and I just couldn’t squeeze her into my schedule.”

She was desperately looking for another therapy clinic while she was in Hollywood when she came across an online community that aims to help people understand the whys and hows of mental health conditions. It also contained some content about the surge of digital counseling in most parts of the world. She thought, “This might work for me. There’s no harm in trying.”

There really isn’t. You can remain anonymous if you want, and all you need to join is a security code that sets you apart from the other ‘patients’ that login for their own therapies. “This kind of effort takes a fair amount of commitment and understanding of the online world.” John M. Grohol, Psy.D. explains.


Liz the Diabetic

 Her heart would race whenever she’s on her way to her physician to have her evaluation. Her appointments usually distracted her naps and she didn’t want to go out because she was a little overweight and she was easily irritated and usually elusive.

When someone introduced her to an app for diabetic care, she finally felt that she would be able to conform to doctor’s orders. The app contained relevant information about diabetes – its causes and symptoms and preventive measures to slow down the disease process. It also provided medical advice about nutrition, insulin dosage, and other data that would help a person understand his or her disease better.

She attests that the results from her current tests showed a reduction in her blood sugar levels. She was following the meal plans that were posted on the app and after a few weeks, her results were fantastic. She had also tried online cognitive behavioral therapy and said that it was really effective.



 We may think that face-to-face therapy is more preferable, but studies suggest that about 57% of individuals treated online were symptom-free after a 30-day trial, and 42% were cured of traditional therapy.

Liz says, “Looking a therapist in the eye across an unfamiliar consulting room when you have something personal to say can be difficult and intimidating. Learning how to take care of myself and preventing my diabetes from aggravating through digital therapy has been one of the best things that happened in my life.”










8 Reasons Why We All Need Therapy



Many will disagree with this, but it is a fact that everyone needs a specific form of therapy at some point in their lives. It doesn’t mean that you’re crazy if you’re seeing a therapist or a counselor for private sessions. In reality, you are considered a very courageous individual if you want to get help for your issues. It’s just that the stigma on counseling prevents people from seeking the much-needed services from qualified mental health professionals. “Sadly, only a small percentage of people actively seek professional help for their mental health problems,” says Sal Raichbach, PsyD.


Why We Need The Help Of A Therapist


You go into a room and sit in front of your therapist as you mumble away all your problems, fears, and worries. But that’s not all there is to therapy. Sarah Rumpf, MA, LPCC  says that “Therapy is a lot like other things in life, in that you’ll get out of it what you put in. You’ll need to put in effort to get results.” You are not there just to talk about whatever you like. Counseling is more than that.


The pressures of life have become overwhelming for most of us, and this is the very point as to why we need to unload all of it. If we do not process our emotions well, mental health issues will surface and complicate a person’s life even more. All alone in our thoughts, it can sometimes cause irrational beliefs and unreasonable logic. We tend to think negatively and may harm ourselves by being reactive or explosive. Maybe even, at worse, inflict self-harm.


We all need someone who will understand us and let us release our emotional issues, but also help us make ourselves feel better afterward. That’s what a therapist or counselor can do for you. It may be a small or significant issue. Still, you need a helping “hand.”


Here are eight reasons as to why we all need therapy:


  1. When you feel lost, or you feel that you have lost your way and didn’t know where to go, then it’s a sign that you need therapy. How else can you find clarity if it’s just you drowning in your thoughts? You will need someone to guide you when you are so lost, and the only qualified person to do that is a therapist.


  1. According to Sarah Howson, LPC, CADC III, “Anger is a normal human emotion. Sometimes the way that we handle this emotion causes various problems in our lives.” But if you are abnormally angry, always agitated and extremely moody for an extended period, then something is bothering you that you can’t quite process on your own. With that, you will require a specialist who can help you let it all out healthily. That is one of the functions of a counselor.


  1. There are times when significant changes in life challenge us mentally and emotionally. What are these changes? It can be marriage, divorce, the death of a loved one, moving homes, starting a new job, resigning from your position, and more. With this, you can become stressed out and overwhelmed. A therapist can help you cope with these life changes by practicing specific strategies.


  1. Have you felt that you are losing control of your life? If yes, then you can benefit from therapy. The therapist will help you regain the feeling so that you can move on positively in control.


  1. Who doesn’t have a strained relationship here, right? Everyone is bound to experience heartache because of their loved ones. It can be your spouse, partner, significant other, parents, siblings, family members, or friends. A counselor will lead you to a path of self-discovery so that the pain of dealing with a strained relationship is manageable and you will be able to cope.


  1. Those suffering from lack of sleep can also enlist the help of a therapist. People who can’t sleep well at night are troubled subconsciously. You need at least 8 hours of sleep without interruptions so you can function correctly. With that, a qualified therapist can assist you with insomnia through a specified program.


  1. Some people tend to harm themselves due to self-hate, frustration, helplessness, and hopelessness. If you are contemplating about it, STOP RIGHT THERE. DON’T DO IT. Instead, call a suicide hotline immediately and tell them about your situation. After that, contact a therapist online for a quick response.


  1. At times we feel all alone or isolated. You know what? Talking helps, mainly if you speak with a counselor. You will never feel alone again.


There are so many reasons as to why people must go into therapy. These points mentioned are just some of the essential purposes of seeing a therapist.…

Life Counseling Services: Fight Suicidal Thoughts (Here’s What You Can Do)

When you are suicidal, you only think about the negative things in your life. You lose focus and suddenly lose the interest to live. You are sad and lonely, devastated and hopeless. But it shouldn’t have to be that way. Here’s what you can do to fight suicidal thoughts.

Ways To Fight Suicidal Thoughts

  • Remove anything that you could use to harm yourself. Blades, ropes, pills, or anything that might cause any physical damage, you have to get rid of them. If you are in an unsafe place, move away. Find ways to detach yourself from committing suicide.
  • Tell someone how you feel. Your friends, your family, or even your pet can be that someone. It is so important because it makes you feel less alone and it helps a lot. It makes you more in control of your feelings. Talking to someone helps in removing some parts of your emotional burden.
  • Draw, paint, sing, and dance. It’s perfectly okay to feel like not talking to anyone. However, you should find other things to do rather than thinking about suicide. Working on your hobbies is something that can make you consider other things rather than harming yourself.
  • Be kind to yourself. Bear in mind that the only person that can help you is yourself. It may be difficult in certain situations but don’t let your emotions take over your decisions. You can at least talk to yourself and tell it how much it needs to focus on living. “Focus on yourself and your own happiness and do not compare yourself to others.” As advised by Marc Romano, PsyD.
  • Act in an opposite approach and counteract how you feel. Instead of thinking of killing yourself, work on ways to pamper yourself. You can take a hot shower, cook your favorite food, get a new haircut, watch a funny movie, go to the mall, and so on. Find ways to divert your attention to something that keeps you away from having suicidal thoughts.
  • Write down things you would want to experience. Get a piece of paper and write down things you look forward to achieving in your life. It could be a holiday trip, visiting your favorite restaurant, getting a new car, transferring into a new apartment, or anything that’s pretty much attainable. Take time to read it often so you won’t misalign your thoughts.
  • Value the people around you and don’t push them away. To be able to feel less alone, keep people close to you all cost. This way, you won’t only make yourself feel comfortable, but it will also prevent you from thinking about suicide. Always consider everybody’s presence because they can serve as someone who would be there for you anytime.
  • Come up with a safety plan. Sometimes, you won’t be able to control your emotions, so you need to address it as soon as possible. Don’t allow time to decide for you. Have a list of emergency hotlines in case anything happens. Take a list of coping strategies that you feel comfortable doing.
  • Contact professional help. There’s no better way to address your situation but to seek professional advice. Therapists can explain to you what’s happening and why you’re having those negative thoughts. It’ll allow you to be aware of your current situation. “Therapists can provide support, problem-solving skills, and enhanced coping strategies for issues such as depression, anxiety, relationship troubles, unresolved childhood issues, grief, stress management, body image issues and creative blocks,” says Chris Corbett, PsyD.

“Not all people who have thoughts of suicide end up acting on those thoughts. But for those who do, generally there is deep emotional pain combined with a belief that things will never improve.” Dr. Chantal Gagnon Ph.D. LMHC explains. But if you know your reasons to fight, you won’t have intentions to quit. Always remember that there’s something good about life.


My Ex-Husband Said I Need A Psychiatrist, And Here’s Why


Woman, you have got to calm down. I ain’t talking to you when you’re like this, some batshit crazy person who just came out of the loony bin.” The imbecile coldheartedly told me that after I discovered that he has an ongoing affair with my son’s tutor. I know! He has to tap our son’s teacher, and our boy doesn’t even need his father’s “help” on that matter since he is brilliant. I was beyond pissed.

I do understand what Stacy Donn Cristo, LMHC used to say, “Love is the root of what brings each and every one of us to therapy—the need to understand love, the hunger and desperation to find love and experience love, the desire to love and the desire to be loved.” But clearly, I was at the end of my rope, and I told him to screw himself, his new fugly girlfriend, and that I wanted a divorce. Immediately. He laughed and said, “Like you need to remind me twice, b*#$@! (Starts with a B and rhymes with SITCH.) You’re the worst lay I have ever had in my entire life. Go to a psychiatrist, or maybe a sex therapist so that you’d learn a thing or two about it. No wonder I keep cheating on you. Pathetic.”

I was stunned. His words crushed my being. I mean, we’ve been together since we were fifteen and we learned everything from each other. Now, after all these years and two beautiful kids, he has the guts to tell me that I suck in bed? That was his reason for cheating on me and breaking our marriage vows? Hell, no.

But what if he was right? He has had practice over the years. I’d find him with another girl or some slut, and we’d separate for a bit. After a few months, I’d forgive him. That was the cycle. But this time it’s different. I never told him that I wanted a divorce until now. Ten or more infidelity discoveries in eight years – this is the first time I’ve said that I want a divorce. This is also the first time he said that he also wants it, in a way.

Did I cry? Yes, I did. I’d be lying if I said no. We were sweethearts for five years and married for eight years. That’s thirteen years of my life with him. I love that stupid momma’s boy to the bone, but I realized that he doesn’t love me enough. If he cared about me, he wouldn’t have hurt me over and over again. But he did, and I think he’s right. Not on the sex part though since I know that I’m a goddess in the sack. He was right when he said that I needed to see a psychiatrist.

Dr. Chantal Gagnon PhD LMHC article once quoted that “Happy people do things differently. They make their emotional wellbeing a priority and practice daily and weekly habits that help them create joy, happiness and satisfaction in their lives.” With that, I need to heal from all the low self-esteem, barely-there self-confidence, the verbal and emotional abuse, and well, my upcoming divorce. We have two sons together, and I am left to explain to our boys why mommy and daddy need to separate for good. I am left to explain that daddy’s new girlfriend is their tutor. How am I going to tell that to a couple of six-year-olds? Now, I am sure that I need some type of help.

To say that I regret to have met him is false. I wouldn’t have my sons if we didn’t meet. If there were one thing that he gave me that was precious, it would be our children. Other than that, I would like to close the books on our past and start moving forward. “Focus on yourself and your own happiness and do not compare yourself to others,” says Marc Romano, PsyD. And that is what I am going to do.…